28 October 2009

Fashion Victim

Another strategy I employed while reducing my luggage weight in in Europe was to chuck out everything but the most essential clothes. This turned out to be a largely fruitless exercise as the newly created space was quickly reoccupied by souvenir junk from all over the place. But when I got back to Australia, it did give me the overwhelmingly exciting chance to head into town to restock my wardrobe. And then blog about it.

Now I've never been well regarded for my taste in clothes. I realise that in terms of casting a disapproving eye over what others consider to be the it look for the season (whatever that is supposed to mean) I don't really have a leg to stand on.

But it has come to this: I was in David Jones for a few simple necessities; beige trousers, plain coloured t-shirts and a black felt fedora. I stepped off the escalator into the menswear department and immediately had to check the directory to make sure I was on the right floor, and that I hadn't just walked into the ladies' shirts aisle.

At this point regular FFH readers might be calling to mind a few important Far From Home traditions.

1) I have been known, on occasion, to stretch the truth ever so slightly in order to emphasise a point. For example, I haven't actually ever set fire to Koorong, or any other Christian bookshop for that matter.

2) At times, these artificially elongated truths can get a bit out of hand and take on a life all of their own. For example, it's not clear (though, in my defense, certainly not out of the question) whether the original Oxfam Girl has ever been to Spain, let alone walked the Camino de Santiago.

3) Sometimes I just plain make stuff up.

But no no no no no no no. This time I'm dead serious. At first glance I actually couldn't tell the difference between the menswear and ladieswear departments. Men's fashion really has become that camp.

Furthermore, it's not just me. I was walking through David Jones with a girl the other day and...

... Yes I was walking through David Jones with a girl. I'd rather not talk about why. Just take it on face value that, for very specific and justifiable reasons, I contravened my usual protocols and went shopping with a girl. Now shut up and let me finish.

I was walking through David Jones with a girl the other day and felt compelled to get a second opinion. It turns out she also thinks tight white vests with silver sequins would look a bit sexually ambiguous on a man, to say the least. Apparently androgynous is the new black.

Call me old fashioned, but I liked the old black better.

Far from home




Garry with 2 Rs
Post a Comment