The hat is back on the track, picking up slack, taking no flack, kicking it back and going on the attack. It’s jet black and made of … felt.
And thus ends my brief foray into the swirling morass of the Australian hip-hop subculture.
Yes, almost two years after the cataclysmic tragedy that was the abandonment of my previous hat, and after several utterly frustrating attempts to replace it, my completely awesome family have come to the rescue, pitching in to order me a new one for my birthday that meets my ridiculously strict requirements for acceptable black felt fedoras.
So I’ve now taken possession of a black felt Akubra international style fedora, custom ordered at the Strand hat shop in Sydney and lovingly hand delivered during my parents’ recent trip up for the DMUC jubilee. Yes, I realise that was twelve months ago now, but it's taken me some time to sort out pics to put on my profile and to think up the rhymes for the intro.
I now feel re-licensed to continue being flagrant, which is just as well, because things around here are starting get just a little bit weird. I've had a number of people (I am not discussing what that number might be) ask me about the now infamous (well... not so famous. maybe just inf) Resolution Seven.
Actually I hadn't planned it that way, but "Resolution Seven" sounds awesome. Like it's a bill that enacts the legalisation of unlicensed hoverboard riding, or legsilates for the decriminalisation of deadly force against English backpackers, or something like that.
Okay, even if its application is somewhat more domestic, it's still a cool name. Furthermore, I've realised that I've been approaching Seven from entirely the wrong perspective. I've been wandering around the place feeling like it's somehow my responsibility to find "the right girl" and then impress her.
Bollocks to that. I have a black felt fedora. And I am continuously finding more and more public ways to be blatantly awesome. The right one can come and find me. I'll be the one up the front signing autographs, whether they have been asked for or not.
In anticipation of your comments, please note the following:
Jess: It's probably worth not thinking about this one too hard either
K.Kim: The typographical errors are there deliberately, just to frustrate you.
Harold: It's an interesting point, but your perspective on plasticine algorithms leaves little to the imagination, if you know what I mean.
Rachel: Relax, I'm fine. Same goes for you, Mum.
I don't really care what you make of this one.
Garry with 2 Rs
Damn. I forgot “wiggedy-whack”. That would have been an awesome rhyme.